Sugaring Off

What started off as a conversation with the Beloved Husband about the Boy consuming cotton candy at the fair (too much of it, in BH’s opinion) has resulted in me getting the short end of the stick. Now, I’m off sugar for a month, in a friendly bet. In brief, this is what our conversation sounded like (not for the first time):

I heart sweets?

BH: He eats too many sweets. So do you.

Me: No, we don’t.

BH: Yes, you do. You’re addicted.

Me: No, I don’t even have dessert every day, like a lot of people do. I just like my snacks sweet. Some people like salty stuff.

BH: But you hide sweets all over the house.

Me: That’s because you give me this conversation about being addicted. Which I’m not, by the way.

BH: Yes, you are.

Me: No, I’m not. Look, I’m healthy, I’m not a diabetic, and I’m not overweight. I don’t have many problems associated with sugar over-consumption.

BH: Well, I bet you couldn’t go a month without eating something sweet. No desserts, no candy, no sweets of any kind.

Me: Oh yeah? You’re on!

. . .

Sigh. So now, I think I might have backed myself into a corner which will make the next 27 days very tough. I mean, I’m sure that I can only come out of this for the better. Still . . . I feel a sense of loss. Though I still don’t believe that I’m “addicted” (I haven’t gone through withdrawal symptoms like the headaches described by some people who go off sugar), maybe I am immediately trying to replace sugar with something else, to fill the void. And possibly, I’m going through some of the stages of grief for my loss. BH would say that I’m already at Denial and Bargaining (see below). And I’m sure the Anger and Despair will set in pretty soon. If I can just get through to the Acceptance stage fairly early on, then I’m sure the rest of the way will be a piece of cake (oops, Freudian slip).

Day 1 was especially hard, because all I could see around me on the streets were people eating sweets. It’s unbelievable how many foods-on-the-run are sweets: ice cream, cookies, a chocolate bar, a stick of licorice, or a handful of M&Ms. Where were all the hot dogs and turkey drumsticks?

On Day 2, I honestly think I had a dream about eating something sweet.

On Day 3, while grocery shopping, I was shocked to see that an entire aisle was filled with nothing but sweet snacks of some kind. I had never skipped that aisle before today.

Now entering Day 4, I’m hoping that the Boy will at least want to follow my own good example and join me on my sugar-free journey. (I don’t worry about the Girl–she never whines and begs for anything, least of all, sweets.) I wouldn’t expect him to be as strict on the plan as I will be; still, misery does love company.
Stay tuned, to see if I can come out of this a better person, or will simply end up curled in a ball, stuffing my face with gummy candies.

. . . . . . . . .

BH thinks that the fact that I’m bargaining at all is a sign that I’m addicted; I’m just setting the parameters, so that when I win this bet, he can’t call it on a technicality. So, these are some of the terms that we’ve set out so far (which amendments and more negotiations to follow, I’m sure):

Allowed:

  • fruit, unprocessed (already consume lots every day)
  • juices, pure—no “beverages”, “cocktails” or other “partial juices” (already follow this rule anyway)
  • pops that are “diet”—i.e. containing no sugar, but Aspartame or Sucralose is all right (don’t drink a lot anyway)
  • reasonable amounts in tea or coffee (which I don’t drink every day)
  • reasonable amounts in regular cooking (but no cooking or baking of desserts, of course)
  • muffins—healthy, fibre-filled/fruit-based only
  • pancakes or waffles are fine, but only without maple syrup on top (that’s okay—I have a great recipe for cheese waffles)
  • gum—they contain only minuscule amounts of sugar, if you can even find any that contain real sugar compared to the artificial stuff

Not allowed:

  • cookies, cakes, pastries, etc. (even homemade “healthier” versions)
  • candies
  • chocolate and chocolate bars
  • muffins—cake-like
  • ice cream
  • any dessert that has added sugar
  • pops that have sugar
  • sweet teas and coffees (example: a regular coffee is fine, but a Tim Horton’s Ice Cap is a no-no)
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